The best father any kid could ask for. Answer to question 15 of 100

  15. What is your husband like as a father? How does he interact with your children? What are some of the ways in which he shows them love and respect?

I wanted to give epic answers to these questions in honor of my husband as he deserves all the praise he can get. I have deliberated for many months trying to figure out the perfect responses, nothing I have written so far seems to capture the truth however. All I can come up with ends up sounding like a cheesy infomercial.  I wish I could skillfully tell you how wonderful a father my husband truly is but nothing I say seems adequate. I will just do my best and hope I come close.

 What is your husband like as a father?

My husband is an awesome father! He has been a solid father since the beginning. For example when our first daughter was little he raised her while I went to work. Whenever one of our children was hurt it was my husband who took care of their first aid and comfort. He has always sheltered them from the dangers of the word, and taught them how to survive. He is, and always will be their friend. Our children are blessed to have a father who cares for them as deeply as my husband. He loves them unconditionally and his biggest fear is to die and leave them alone.

  How does he interact with your children?

 As I write this blog post he is playing  video games with them. He also shares with them his passion for music, movies, and TV shows. We are a family of gamers, we play everything from classic to modern. My husband and three of our kids are a killer Fortnite squad and they are a terror of the high seas. The boys play command and conquer with him and they have a lot of fun. Last night we watched Doctor Strange but we have also enjoyed classics like Hello Dolly and Fiddler on the Roof. The same goes for the TV it is extremely diverse. We have binge Stargate one week and I Dream of Gene the next. We even indulge in the obscure things like Wackfu, Rick and Morty, Mike Tyson Mystery Team, and Ōban Star-Racers.  He also spends individual time with each child.

He is teaching our oldest daughter how to cook and order food on a budget.

He helps our middle daughter take and edit photos. He has taught her how to market products and make them presentable.

He builds classic computers with our middle son. They enjoy trying to make the old hardware live again.

With our youngest son, he always answers his crazy questions. He has instilled in him a good work ethic. He has encouraged our son's natural ability to earn and save money by paying him to help with his Angelfish breeding hobby.

What are some of the ways in which he shows them love and respect?

I think the biggest thing that my husband does for our children is while he teaches our children what he knows he is also attentive to their needs and life goals. He has told them on many occasions that he will do whatever he can to help them reach their personal destinations.  

My children and husband do not always see eye to eye, but in the long run, their bond is deep and unlike my relationship with my father they are one lovable unit.They will always be his number one priority.

Abuse is a nasty creature. Answer to question 14 of 100

 14. When you described your traumatic childhood to your husband, what was his reaction? How do you think his perspective on you changed or grew after you talked about it?  

Abuse and its love child PTSD are a living, breathing entities which consume with a hunger that is unmatched in any food chain. How much or little these vile creatures devour of the individuals they pray upon depends on the victim. The reasons for the variation in emotional responses are sometimes people have only a vague notion of what happened to them like a ghost they can see out of the corner of their eye but when they look, at it directly it is gone. While others remember every detail of their abuse as if they are living it repeatedly with full sensory stimulation. My husband is in the latter category not only can he relive his own abuse he can also imagine and recreate other peoples experiences as if he were there personally. This means I have only told him the minor details of my previous life so that he doesn't have more PTSD than he currently has to deal with on a daily basis from his own childhood. These heightened senses are not always bad, however, because he does not treat me with sympathetic indifference when he tells me he knows how I feel he really does. On the other hand, these thoughts are devastating to his mental well being. He has repeatedly told me that he would not be nice to my stepmother or her son if he ever came in contact with them and is always asking me how I survive, with all the things that happened to me. I try to explain to him that I am of the mindset where I know the abuse happened, I can recall some of the most tragic events, but for the most part it feels as if it happened to someone else or like I watched it play out as movie long ago. As frustrating as dealing with my aphantasia has been for him, he never wavers in his devotion to be my protector against my abuse, he would, if given the opportunity fight my battles against my abusers and this makes me feel wanted.

To find out what this question is all about check out my post here

Now what 100 writing prompts

My husband Vs My Father Answer to question 13 of 100

In case you forgot in my absence Writing prompt questions

13. In what ways is your husband similar to your father and in what ways is he different? Have the two of them ever met each other? If so, what was it like, if not, create a hypothetical situation in which they met and chatted.

   

      I have been avoiding answering this question for two reasons, the first being one of my greatest weakness as a writer besides the over use of the word "that" is switching between tenses, past present, and the future, all get mixed together sometimes even in the same sentence. So how do you compair two individuals, one who has resided in the past, while the other is in the present. I still have not figured this out but can not put this off any longer, I am going to just power though, it is not as if this is some massive novel it is mearly a humble blog that I have been neglecting. The second is the very nature of this question requires me to write about my husband who will no doubtably read this if he can get past the first paragraph without getting bored and moving on. Now my husband reading my work in itself would not be a problem except, he always worries about everything. He would  defiantly care about how others will perceive him through my eyes and I do not want to offend him with my words.This my be unavoidable so I beg his forgiveness.

     

     My husband and father, first let me tell you about my father. If you were to ask my brothers to discribe my father they would probably say he was a mean drunk who had no regard for their suffering or their feelings of betrayal and neglect. The believed he just wanted to control them so there was no conflict.  Throughout our childhood my brothers would asked me if I was mad at our dad and I replied "No" every time,  this is not only because it is not in my nature to be mad at someone, I guess I can just see their insides and understand why their exteriors are so ruff around the edges.  To me my father was the man who stood infront of an entire congregation in a dress and lip sang, "Big Girls Don't Cry." He came to my rescue when my candle lighter went out on the way up the isle to light the advent candle. He was the guy who laughed with me so hard at Harry and the Hendersons that we both could hardly draw breath, he was the father who asked me everyday if I had seen Ellie the invisible color changing elephant. In reality he suffered from severe PTSD, and AADHD inattentive type, who bottled up his feelings so much they killed him.

    

    Now to my husband,  the question is where to begin? Let us start on the inside and work our way outward. First of all he has PTSD, AADHD, OCD, GAD,  BD1, and HS. His back is broken and he has severe edima. You would think with all of that weight he has to carry,  he would be a hard person. On the contrary he is one of the softest people I have ever met this does not mean that he is a weakling in any regard he can step up to a challenge if the need arises. I simply mean his heart is not broken. It overflows with love and emotions. Sometimes he is sad sometimeshe is angry but for the most part he is a jolly guy who is quick with a joke, smart, resourceful, and thoughtful of others. He worries alot about the world and what others think of him. He doesn't always see that people care about him, so he feels alone. He is a great muse and a wonderful friend. He loves me despite my flaws and short cummings. His passion for everything he does is massive and his knowledge is vast. He is a caring participating father who loves his children.

      

    So on to the question of my husband's and father's differences, it is like east verses west. My father was a bottler while my husband wears his emotions on his sleeve. My father said nothing, while my husband tells it like it is and then apologies for it afterwards. My father was a workaholic then an unresponsive zombie. My husband does as much as his body allows then plays to ease the pain.  My father did as little as possible to raise us while my husband does as much as he can for our children. Now on to the likes they both are jokers, they love movies, they love me, they like music, and they both have deep scars and fears that effect how they interact with people.

     

      Would they have gotten along? My answer to that is yes and no. The dark side of my father would have hated my husband. He would have been sceptical of his intentions and would have been convinced that he would harm me. He would have advised me not to marry him. The part of my father whom I knew and loved would have noticed how well my husband takes care of, and loves me I truly believe in time he would have accepted him. I think this is why one of my brothers likes my husband while the other does not as they are half of my father one geting the brooding darker side while the other the thoughtful fun side. 

      On one hand I am glad my husband and father never met, it takes away all need to beg my dad to like my husband on the other hand my husband had to deal with my uncle and brothers it is something his photogenic brain can never forget. He spends many hours replaying the situation and hates them for their misjudgment. I am truly sorry he had to suffer their rath and wish I had done more to quench thier fears before they interacted with eachother.

To find out what this question is all about check out my post here

Now what 100 writing prompts

My road to Chemotherapy.

Hello, Normally I am a very private person handling issues internally but lately my life has taken a drastic turn and as a whole it has gotten bigger then myself and my small family to handle on their own. One day I noticed I started getting little brown spots like freckles all over my body then big burses started forming from just the simplest of touch. I jokingly called this my ripe banana syndrome. I went to the doctor and they told me my body was attacking my platelets. To make a very long drawn out story short I have a rare blood disorder. The doctors do not know why I developed it and it is not responding to platelet transfusions, IGIV transfusions and I am having poor response to the steroids. This all means that I now have to have Chemotherapy. For months on end I will be taking treatments with unknown results or side affects. Normally as a person I can handle this sort of thing I think my whole life has been preparing me for just this situation. I however have dependents who need me as I am the sole provider for my disabled husband and our four children. So it is with a humble heart that I call out to you and ask you to read my story the link below and if you have the means give a little. If you do not have the monetary means it is fine I totally understand. I also appreciate all of the prayers and well wishes they are a great comfort.


Sally A Wolf Oncologist Fund

My Anthology submitions published!

Click the links below to find out more!

PRESS RELEASE FOR BLEEDING INK – NOW AVAILABLE AT SMASHWORDS!


Bleeding Ink Author Spotlight – Sally A. Wolf


By it here:
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/178855

NOTE: As this book is rated “Adult Content” in Smashwords you must deactivate the “Adult Filter” in order to search/view.

Wednesday WIPpet Time!!

I opened my eyes to find my dog Lovely standing on my pillow his head to one side a thoughtful expression on his face.

What have you done that has been inspired by Art?

          I have decided to take a little brake from answering questions to ask you one. What have you done that has been inspired by Art?


           When I was in Kindergarten, my teacher gave us a piece of paper and told us to make a squiggle on it. Then she told us to turn that squiggle into a picture of something. I made an "S" type squiggle then turned it into a swan with wings and a beak. Since this did not take me very long to do and the other children were still working I continued my picture, adding water and seven Cygnets, one of which didn't want to get in to the water. When the time was up my teacher had us go to the front and show our work. Everyone had one squiggle that had transformed into one thing. When it was my turn I showed my picture and told my story about the poor swan that was afraid of the water. My teacher was so impressed that she hung up my picture on the blackboard.

          I am now 34 years old and I do not draw any better, but the other day when my youngest son was coloring at the table, I sat down, borrowed a piece of scrap paper and drew a squiggle on it. I asked him what he thought it was and he said that it looked like a crown so I turned the crown into a queen. We continued on until we had a queen, a castle, a wizard, a dragon, a knight, a minstrel and a carriage. He asked me to write a story and this is what I came up with.

The Great Queen:

              There once was a great queen, who thought she was the most powerful creature in her kingdom. One day a wizard from a neighboring land came to visit. She summoned him to her throne room.

            “Great Wizard, seer of all things, am I the most powerful creature in my kingdom?” she asked.

The wizard looked into his crystal ball and said, “My dear queen, you do have many great things. The strongest army, the fastest coach, and a mighty castle.”

            “Then I am the most powerful,” she interrupted excitedly.

He shook his head and replied, “No there is another creature greater than you. A dragon lives in your mountains and he is older, wiser and more powerful than you.”

The queen decided that this would not do. She sent all her knights to defeat the dragon, but none returned. She sold her fastest carriage to put up a reward, but no one could best the dragon. Years went by and soon the castle and the queen were in ruins. One day a minstrel came to visit her.

            “I can slay the dragon!” he told the sorrowful queen.

            “I have nothing to offer you in return,” she said.

            “I only ask for your hand in marriage,” he said smiling.

The queen agreed and the minstrel departed. He returned a week later with the head of the dragon. The queen, being a woman of honor, agreed to marry him. They traveled together all over the world singing the tale of a foolish queen who lost it all trying to have everything.

  The forum members at  http://www.devinwrites.com/ write flash fiction contests every month inspired by a photo prompt. The same is true of my poem Forever Mourning. My friend was going to throw out a chalk picture he had done for class: an orange sunset over a bridge. I asked if I could have it and after looking at it for a moment Forever Mourning came out.

Forever Mourning

Time passes so quickly

Like the water that flows under a forgotten bridge

The sun sets on our lives casting shadows across our loved ones

Leaving only the memories of their existence

And the colors behind

The cool water that rushes down river

Whispers a song of sorrow to the weeping wind

It tells of hate and anger

That has long since been abandoned

Opening up to love and friendship that can never end

Since the forever mourning current carries us away

We can only hope to reach the ocean together one day

So until we can walk along the beach

With the sand between our toes

And the foam tickling our ankles

I bid you farewell

As the sun sets beyond the horizon

Leaving only our memories

And their colors behind.

So, in other words, art inspires writing and writing inspires art.  Just look at the success of comic books. Think about that next time you create something, even if you don't think it turned out. One day it might inspire someone else.

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