7. What do you think it was about your step mother that appealed to your father? Why do you think he was willing to let her have her way with you without assertively stopping the punishment? What would you say to a man in love with such a mean-spirited person to convince the man to stay away?
What do you think it was about your step mother that appealed to your father?
Before you I can answer this question first I have to tell you a little bit about my mother. She was a kind person who saw the best in everyone and refused to believe in the bad. I have heard from two different people now that my mother met my step mother in collage. When My stepmother was going through a divorce my mother offered for her to come and stay until she was on her feet. It was during this time that my stepmother would make her first move toward my dad. Several hours before my dad was due home from work she would disappear, and then magically reappear all gussied up when my father came home. She would spend the next several hours waiting on him. This attention stuck in my fathers mind and when my mother died and he no longer had anyone to take care of him he turned to her for comfort. My father had a very dependent personality, that required someone to tell him what to do or he was lost. I think that it stems from the fact that he never stopped being a soldier.
Why do you think he was willing to let her have her way with you without assertively stopping the punishment? To some extent I believe that my father was somewhat like my mother in that he only saw the good in people. She took good care of him therefor she took good care of us. She manipulated him into thinking that we were the problem that despite her best efforts we were rejecting her because she was not our mother. Other then that I think that he was color blind. There were things that she did to us right in front of him. Like one time she asked me if I washed my hands before dinner. She didn't believe me so she went outside and got a cup of dirt, pored it on my food, and made me eat it all. My dad was sitting there the whole time just watching T.V. During the trial he told the judge that he had done all of those bad things, I wonder if he truly believed that because he did nothing somehow he did.
What would you say to a man in love with such a mean-spirited person to convince the man to stay away?
First of all in relationships like this where one of the parties is being sucked dry by the other. The victim has no idea that, their special someone is mean spirited. This is the real problem, everything to them is wonderful and they are shocked when it all crumbles down around their ears. It is like a great wall that is built out of bricks of promises of fake safety. Over time the river of reality erodes the foundation from underneath it. This means that on the surface it looks like the wall will never fall down but soon there is no foundation. One day out of the blue the force of all the lies will make it topple this causes an avalanche that barriers everyone involved. Some people are found or escape, while others are crushed under the wait of the loss. All you can do is be moral support when it is required.